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Pembroke College Oxford May Ball

Two years ago, I was invited to attend the Pembroke College Oxford ball as a guest of my sister, The Keen One a.k.a Kenny. I had such a great time, so I was more than happy to go again this year, and I got to bring Starbucks Gal with me!

The theme of the ball was Studio 54, a throwback to the disco 70s era, and highlights included Love Train (an awesome funk band), the silent disco (Dancing Queen will always be a TUNE), the ball pit because why the heck not? And of course, taking breaks from partying to watch the Simpsons in the college common room. The tenuous link to Studio 54 was that the episodes shown had Disco Stu in them; so random but I was here for it tbh.

Here are some pictures from the night- Ken and I played our FAVE game of Stalking The Photographer To Get In As Many Photos As Possible, and we got some great shots!

MayBall1

MayBall4

MayBall2

MayBall5

MayBall3

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I Hate The Kidneys (And Other Epiphanies)

Okay, hate might be a bit of a strong word. But I’m definitely finding renal physiology challenging. VERY challenging. Some of this stems from how I didn’t do A Level Biology, so I feel a bit behind on some of the basic kidney physiology, and I’ve had to do some catching up.

It’s not been too bad though; KhanAcademy videos have been very helpful, and I’ll even admit that I started with GCSE Bitesize and A Level textbooks to get to grips with the very basics, so those have been quite useful too. 

Epiphany 2: When you start questioning whether or not you need more than 4 hours of sleep is when you know you really need to go to sleep.

The above is quite self explanatory to be honest. New lows for me this term.

Epiphany 3: I am very irritable on limited sleep.

This is linked to epiphany 2, and it’s not much of an epiphany because I already knew this, but my cranky levels have sky rocketed this semester. I think it’s because I’ve been sleeping even less than normal, and when I’m tired I find most things annoying. Seriously. From people breathing too loud, to the way they talk; the most irritating thing is when people ask me if I’m okay. The frustrating thing is that I know that I’m being unreasonable and ridiculous, which makes me annoyed with myself, and then the whole cycle starts again.

Epiphany 4: I don’t like being set up with people.

It makes me feel uncomfortable when people who don’t know me well talk about my love life (or lack of one), and there are few things that put me off someone more than when I feel like I’m being pressured. I’m very much a ‘let the chips fall as they may’ person. 

Epiphany 5: I have missed blogging.

I take breaks from here when life gets hectic, and I feel like there are too many people in my head for me to honestly convey my thoughts. I’m feeling better though, so here’s to more frequent updates in the future, she blogged optimistically. 

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Module 8 Placement (Gastro) & End of Term

In the four years that have passed since I started this blog, I think this is the longest I’ve gone without an update.

To say this semester has been busy would definitely be an understatement, but I’m home now (YAY), and now have more free time (YAY again), so I can go back to blogging; I’ve really missed it.

A lot has happened in the last month, so I’ll start with some highlights from gastro secondary care placement:

Getting to scrub in and help out in theatre was really fun! It was useful to practise scrubbing in properly for the first time since first year, and the consultant we were with was very patient, such a nice man! The procedure was a panproctocolectomy (removal of the whole colon), and it was quite the procedure- so. much. blood.

I was absolutely grilled on CT interpretation during one of our sessions, and I never got to thank one of my colleagues, who sneakily whispered answers to me, saving me from embarrassment in front of everyone. The person probably didn’t think much of what they did, but it was much appreciated, and meant a lot.

We got to clerk patients from A&E when I stayed out of hours, and this put us on the spot because we had to present our findings to the consultant, and come up with management plans. I felt more junior doctor than medical student that evening, and it made me so excited to graduate and start doing it properly!

In a liver disease clinic, I watched the consultant give a fantastic explanation of Hepatitis C to a patient, and it was truly the best information giving I have ever seen. SO GOOD. The clinic also made me realise that I’d been quite judgmental about IV drug users in the past, so meeting an actual drug user completely shattered my misconceptions and prejudice.

I’m definitely not a natural at suturing- I struggled initially, and it took me a while to get the hang of it, but I’m think I’m there now… well, sort of.

Suturing

We received the results of our OSCE today, and I passed, HALLELUJAH. I’m just so relieved, because the OSCE was the toughest one I’ve had to date; suturing and ERCP interpretation were particularly not great, and not going to lie, there were definitely some tears afterwards, so I’m just grateful to God that overall it was okay.

What else have I been up to? Well the annual charity fashion show was last month too, and I modelled for New Look and the Nigerian Society, and it was so much fun!

New Look 2017Nigerian Society 2017

I’m also finally done with being a student caller for the year, and we managed to raise over £180,000 for various programs across the university, so I was honoured to a part of it all.

Boy am I glad the term is over though! With work and placement and volunteering and revision and well, socialising, ofcourse, it’s been very draining, so looking forward to relaxing over the next week at home 😀

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Why Am I So Accident Prone?

So, I’m walking with a limp again, and just like last time, it was caused by netball. Sigh.

For anyone who doesn’t know, my last week of neurology placement last semester involved me limping around the wards because I sprained my knee. This time, it’s my ankle that’s the problem, and I twisted it while playing netball with my housemates in the park.

It was a spontaneous decision to have a “throw about,” which is like a kick about but much better because it involves netball, and it was very cute and fun, even though I hurt my leg. Just look how happy we all were!

House Netball

On a positive note, I went home this weekend, so I was able to get some much needed TLC and food from Abs (my mother). My ankle is feeling better too, so here’s hoping I don’t do any more damage to it…

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That Time Embryology Made Me Cry

Yes, this actually happened.

It was last week, my PBL was on the embryology and functional anatomy of the rectum, and nothing was making sense. Hours passed and I’d not written much; I had numerous books out, embryology websites, and even Youtube videos up, but everything they said seemed like a different language. This was when I began to panic.

I was gripped with fear like I’ve never been before. And all my medical school insecurities came out in full force:

“If you can’t understand the embryology, do you really understand any other part of medicine?”

“Ofcourse you don’t get it- you had to do a foundation year so you’re not even a proper medic”

“It’s only luck that’s gotten you this far, and everyone will soon see how much of an imposter you are”

“You’re probably going to fail this year.”

All of this was going through my head, and it was awful. My room started to feel very small, looking at my blank Word document made me feel like I couldn’t breathe, and my chest felt like it was being squeezed.

So what did I do next? Hint: It’s mentioned in the title of this post. I cried.

You see, I debated blogging about this for a while, but I thought it was important to talk about this side of medical school. Obviously I can’t speak for anyone else, but for me, feeling like an imposter is a huge part of my med school experience. I find it hard to shake off the feeling that everyone is much smarter than me, and that I’m just good at tricking people into thinking that I’m smart too.

That was probably why not understanding my PBL caused me to react like that. It didn’t help that earlier that day, I’d had some scary talks about third year exams and how tough they are, so that just added to my worries. It wasn’t the first time I’d come across a topic I didn’t understand, but it was definitely the first time I’d felt like I couldn’t breathe because of it. And that was what made it scarier.

A call from the Keen One a.k.a Kenny was exactly what I needed. She gave me some tough love, and reminded me of 2 Timothy 1:7. She also reminded me that of course I’m going to struggle if I try and do it all alone, and that it was by God’s grace that I got on the course in the first place, so I should stop freaking out and take things one day at a time.

She then got me to close my laptop, go to bed, and go through the embryology with a fresh mind in the morning. My sister is my rock, and I would honestly be so lost without her.

So, to anyone else who struggles with med school insecurities and fear of failure like I do, this is a post to say that you are not alone.

(P.S- If anyone was wondering, I got my PBL work done, and it was submitted two whole days before the deadline. Tai (and God’s help) 1 – 0 Embryology).

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Challenge of the Month: Tinder

Me: “Mummy, I’m now on Tinder.”

Abs (My mother): “What’s Tinder?”

Me: “It’s a dating app.”

Abs (My mother): ” … Why? Is it for Christians?”

Two very good questions from Abs tbh.

Anyone who follows this blog will know that I like to do something new every month to get out of my comfort zone, but when my housemate first suggested Tinder, I was like HECK to the NO.

You see, as a self proclaimed prude and “ice queen” and Christian, Tinder is something I have never considered. It has a not so great reputation as a sleazy hook up app, and that was what I thought it was for. My housemate was quick to let me know that I was being a bit judgemental, having not experienced it for myself, so I was challenged to try it out.

The goal? To go on a Tinder date and prove that there are nice people on it. So with this in mind, I downloaded the app. Forever #reppingGod, I put my favourite Bible verse in my bio, to let peeps know what I’m about innit:

screenshot_20170106-152159

And then I started swiping, which led me to some… interesting people:

screenshot_20170122-234618 screenshot_20170105-202716

screenshot_20170106-231111

My first match was with a guy who was a twin as well, and I was so hyped because OMG what are the odds, right? But then he sent me this:

screenshot_20170106-152255    …. So that was the end of that.

In total I matched with about 25 people, which was 25 more than I thought I would match with tbh – one of them used to be the title character in Billy Elliot on the West End, so claim to fame?

And now, on to the Tinder date.

It was with a recent graduate, who was also into films, and worked in healthcare. He suggested going for a drink, and I was quick to let him know that I wasn’t interested in a relationship or anything like that.

(You see, in naive Tai Land, “not interested in a relationship or anything like that” means I just want to be friends, but apparently that not what it means on Tinder. But I digress…)

We met in a pub, and it was… interesting; he came dressed in a suit. A SUIT.

I felt so under dressed in my dungarees (LOL), and it was just very awkward. There were only about 5 people in the whole pub (us included), so it was even more awks. He wasn’t much of a talker – a lot of our conversation was led by me, as he just stared whenever I stopped talking. It was very odd, and a bit unnerving.

Don’t get me wrong, I thought he was nice, but when he abruptly left the pub without saying goodbye, because I didn’t feel comfortable with giving him my number, I knew I had made the right choice. Some people have tried to argue that I was harsh for not giving it to him, as he had “been so nice,” but I was quick to assert that I completely have the right to not give him my number.

I had made it clear to him that us going for drinks was 100% platonic, and I also had no intention of seeing him again, so this “nice guy” entitlement culture is a load of bull. Shout out to the waitress in the pub for agreeing with me; women should not feel pressured to do anything they don’t want to. No. No. NO.

On a lighter note though, Mahan and Shak are the best for coming to the pub to make sure I’d be okay. They pretended not to know me ofcourse, but knowing they were close by was reassuring. I am so blessed to have friends who would come on a date with me, so that’s a positive thing to take away from all this.

Anyway, final thoughts on Tinder:

  • I was wrong for thinking that it’s just for getting with people; friendships can be formed on it too!
  • Personally, it’s not for me though. I didn’t like how it’s mainly based on judging people by how they look, and I felt bad for being so quick to dismiss people because of their chosen profile pictures.
  • So I think I’d prefer to meet people face to face than online; people can be completely different people over social media, and I learned that quickly with my Tinder date… #neveragain.